Wednesday, July 18, 2018

Patience vs. Assertiveness

One of my seven-year old son's favorite things is attempting to get baseball players to throw him baseballs before, during, and/or after baseball games. A term known as "toss-ups" made famous by the YouTuber, Zack Hample.

He's pretty good at this, actually. He (sometimes with my assistance on a couple of occassions) has received baseballs from Chicago Cubs at Wrigley Field, Guaranteed Rate Field, and Busch Stadium. And he's raked from numerous minor league teams at various locations.

Recently, while, at Wrigley Field waiting for toss-ups, two hours prior to the game, I started to reflect on this hobby. And as I reflected, I realized that there are two very good life skills that you need in-order to be successful in collecting toss-ups.

  • Patience. You must be patient. Lately, when my son and I attend a baseball game, we get there when the gates open. That's two-hours before the game starts. There's a lot of sitting, and a lot of waiting. Last year, for example, we arrived to Guaranteed Rate Field at 4:30 to get in-line so that we could be some of the first entrants when the stadium doors opened at 5:00 for a 7:00 game. This meant that (at the time) my six-year old son was waiting, in July, in the sun from 4:30 to 5:00; we stood together and we talked to each other to pass the time.

    Once we were inside we watched the players take batting practice, but patting practice does not last the duration of time from when they let you into the stadium and when the game actually begins; there is a lot of down time. Nonetheless, he was engaged from 4:30pm to after 10:00pm when the game ended. And I kid you not, we left our seats less than a handful of times while at the game. He's a great fan. I love going to games with him.

    *He ended-up with two baseballs from the Cubs (from batting practice) this particular evening.

    *I assure you, this is entirely my son's idea. I think it's awesome and I love doing it with him, but doing so is always his decision.

    Patience is a skill. Just like anything else, to get better at it, you have to practice it. Practicing patience is worth it; it's a valuable trait to possess.
  • Persistence. You must be persistent. You have to be willing to speak-up. You have to be willing to communicate - clear, concise, and loud - what you want when the time arrives. We aren't the only ones at these games trying to get these "toss-ups." Quite the contrary, actually; these "toss-ups" make nice collections and souvenirs so they can be pretty desirable to obtain. When the opportunity comes for a "toss-up" you best be ready; make your way to the front, and communicate in a way that allows you to stand-out (while remaining extremely polite). And if you don't get that "toss-up," you better stay ready for the next opportunity, and then the next one, and then the one after that, too.

    Sometimes, to get what you want, you must be persistent. That does NOT mean being rude, nor does it justify being rude. Do NOT confuse those two things, they aren't the same.

    Just like patience, you can become more persistent the more opportunities that you have to practice being persistent. And it's another very valuable trait to have throughout life.

Mornings

It's summer. Some days I work, other days I take as vacation. Getting out of the house is easy. I'm in charge of getting myself ready, and that's it. My mornings are relaxing in June and July.

This post has been in draft format since April or May. I'm finally sharing it, now, as I've had a little extra time to polish it up.


Show me a house where the above quote (from the Kids Deserve It book) isn't the norm for kids. Show me a house where the above quote isn't the norm for adults.

What follows is a timeline of an especially crazy morning that I experienced, last spring.

4:50am - My alarm sounds. I get out of bed, I get dressed and get ready to leave the house for a #RunBeforeTheSun (shout-out to Gregg Bruno).

5:33am - I return from my run and I am startled by my son. He's sitting in the living room, and he tells me that he doesn't feel good; this is not normal, he doesn't usually miss school. He must not feel well.

5:35am - Unsure what to do, I start to get ready for the day; brainstorming options for what we'll do if my son can't go to school are racing through my head

I convinced my wife (she's a first grade teacher) to do one of the things that I hate the most (as a principal). She puts in for a substitute, and it's after 6am. Good luck getting that covered.

My kind and beautiful wife was going to stay home with our son, but she still has to get her classroom and sub plans ready. So she leaves the house sometime after 6am to do what she needs to get done. But that means that I'm in charge of getting our three-year-old daughter out-of-the-house. Yikes!

7:02am - My daughter and I leave the house. My son is left on the couch waiting for Mom to get back home (it won't be long). Please, don't judge us.

My wife usually takes our daughter to play school (and I am usually responsible for getting my son to school as it is along the route that I take to get to work). My wife also usually gets our daughter ready for the day, and I am tasked with overseeing that our son gets "ready." She is four, he is seven; you can see where my job is a little bit easier in this regard.

On this particular morning, however, it's on me to get Olivia (our daughter) ready. I'm thankful that she went to bed, last night, dressed for the day. I know that M&Ms and chocolate milk are poor choices for breakfast, but it's easier so we do it anyways (again, please don't judge). I'm not even going to try wordsmith the situation that was her hair...

Nonetheless, we made it. I got her to where she needed to go. And I was headed to work.

7:30am - I arrive to school (10-15 minutes later than usual due to the circumstances). As I enter the building, I'm welcomed by the news that we are short subs.

We hit the ground running! There is no norm when you're working with other people, and especially when you are working with kids. Embracing that idea makes coordinating the chaos (shout-out to the self proclaimed Chaos Coordinator, Lindsy Stumpenhorst) seem far less overwhelming.

Tuesday, July 17, 2018

Goals - #DadsAsPrincipals

Earlier this month, as my family drove home after attending a Chicago Cubs baseball game, we were trying to remember how many Cubs games our son Ryne has attended. For a seven year old, living in Iowa, he's been to quite a few games.

The road games were easy to recall. He's seen the Cubs play in Pittsburgh, Milwaukee, Minnesota, St. Louis, and on the south side of Chicago. The playoff game, last fall, was another game that definitely stood-out. As did his first game, when he was eight-months old, that resulted in a walk-off victory against San Francisco in the 13th inning (to be fair, we were already an hour outside of the city while we listened to the conclusion of this game on the radio).

But we were unable to recall an exact number. We estimated that he's probably been to approximately 20 Cubs games. A number that I'm pretty proud of as his Dad.

Anyways...while we were having this conversation...my wife, nonchalantly, suggested that we (my son and me) attend a Major League Baseball game in all 30 Major League Baseball stadiums by the summer that he finishes high school.

I don't think that she realized what she had just said; it was game-on! The next day I was mapping out where we've been, where we need to go, which cities could be clustered together in one-trip, and envisioning an epic finale the summer after he graduates from high school where we could conclude our list on the east coast with our final five stadiums.

My math says that we have 11 years to make 11 trips and check-off 20 stadiums. My wife is already second-guessing the subtle words that she spoke. But there's no turning back now. Let's go!

What's this got to do with you? What's this got to do with us, educators?
  • Commit to a goal. Write it down. Share it with someone, better yet, share it with everyone.
  • Form a plan.
  • Make it happen. Be relentless.
"Some people talk about what they want to do, and others go do what they want to do. Make it happen for yourself and go do." - @MrAdamWelcome, #RunLAP 

#DadsAsPrincipals - #DadsAsCoaches

Over a decade ago, the opportunity to coach is why I got into education.

Fast forward...I came to love being an educator so much that i gave up my coaching aspirations to pursue educational administrative positions. For the past six years, my coaching responsibilities have been limited to crowd control while I’ve volunteered to help “coach” baseball, basketball, flag football, and soccer with my son’s various teams.


This past spring/summer, my son graduated from “rec” ball and played a more competitive brand of baseball. He was on the 7U Tigers; it was still coach pitch, but it was certainly an accelerated version of what he’d previously experienced. Again, I volunteered to help coach.
What follows are a few reflections from that experience:


Coaching your child is HARD. Maybe the hardest. I’ve been on both ends of this. My Dad coached me and now I have spent time coaching my children.


It’s hard because you know your child more than any of the other kids. You feel more comfortable with them. You know their capabilities. And you want the world for your child. As a result, it's easier and more natural for you to be in their ear more than the other kids. But they don't see it as Dad (or Mom) wants the best for me; they just hear you always talking (nagging - let's call a spade a spade) at them.


On the flip side, coaching your child, and being able to share the triumphs that he/she experiences, individually or as a team are incomparable. Triumphing as a team is one of the best, maybe the best, things about sports. It is only enhanced when you are able to feel those sensations with family.


My advice:
  • Encourage more than anything
  • Explain why when making suggestions
  • Make sure to include plenty of praise whenever you critique
  • When you’re at practices and/or games, play the role of coach; when you’re at home, or the park, or whenever/wherever else...play the role of parent
  • Have FUN. Sports are games. Your son/daughter is just a kid; these opportunities won’t last forever. Enjoy them!